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My second year at Show Choir Camps of America, I was put in  a group that for the first day I thought were a bunch of pricks. We sat down to learn the vocals for the first song and I was sandwiched between a guy carrying a Coach satchel and a guy that needed to “warm up” before we sang.

Like I said, these people looked like pricks. I decided to give the guys next to me  a break. We both shared the same interest in show choir, I figured that we all could at least get along on some sort of level. I turned to the guy with the Coach bag around his shoulder and asked where he was from. He rudely responded with “Hannibal, Missouri.” So I responded WITH A SMILE and said “Like Hannibal Lector?” ….Now I understand that he probably got that stupid jokes a million times. On a comedic value scale it would probably rank at a low two. But my poor joke was not deserving of the response that I got. He looked at me, from head to toe, and turned around to face forward.

Who the hell are you?!

After that blunt jab to my confidence, I turned (slowly) to face the OTHER prick sitting beside me. I asked him where he was from and what show choir he was in. That question was answered in silence. Like any normal person, I figured he hadn’t heard me. So I asked again..”What school are you from?” ….silence…I then proceeded to tap him on the shoulder because this asshole was going to answer my question! He turned to me, smiled, then uttered “I heard you. I was humming to warm up my voice and didn’t want to be interrupted.” My face looked at him in disgust and confusion.

Who the hell are YOU?!

I sat there and wondered why people are so nutty and why I am so friendly. Luckily, those were the only two OBVIOUSLY rude people who I met during my week at camp. The other rude people were more quiet about it; they just gave me dirty looks.

Seriously guys, be polite and talk about me BEHIND my back.

 My group consisted of a lot of amazing kids and only a few assholes. Among the amazing people who I met while at camp were Madeline, Audrey, Rosie, and Michelle. All of these girls are insane and all of them are great. I will give you a little rundown on each of them:

Mads: Maddie is insanely gorgeous and the last time I saw her she was extremely orange. Even as a carrot she looked good. Maddie and I will often have bitch sessions over the phone and we rarely return each other’s phone calls.


 Rosie & Audrey: On maybe the 3rd day of camp, my whole group was sitting in folding chairs around a grand piano learning our second song. As we are singing, an awful noise come from the girls section and everyone looked around to see where the hideous noise had come from. Suddenly everyone looked at Audrey and Rosie. To this day, I still don’t which one sings like a water buffalo, but they both looked with embarrassment in their eyes.



 Michelle: Probably half the week had gone by when I met Michelle. The only reason I know this girl is because she looks EXACTLY like Hayden Panettiere. After being polite and talking about how she resembled the Heroes star behind her back, I finally marched up to her and said “I loved you in Remember the Titans.” She stared at me with a puzzled look on her face and wondered what the hell I was talking about. I think she was pissed that I revealed her undercover identity. I refused to allow her to have a normal life at SCA. She was going to reveal that she was really HaydenPanettiere or I was going to reveal it for her. To this day, she hasn’t admitted it. But like Hannah Montana, one day she will come out of her closet…or should I say plush dressing room. You can’t have the best of both worlds Hayden!

"Michelle's" true identity: Hayden


Luckily, after weeding out those douche bags that I sat beside on the first day, I met these hilarious girls. Show Choir Camp starts this Sunday and I can’t wait to share more amazing adventures with my “Wheaton Girls.”

P.S. Happy Birthday Hayden (Michelle)

2 responses to “A satchel, a buffalo, and one good week

  1. Audrey ⋅


  2. rosie ⋅

    ZACHARY!!!!! hahahahaha omg i died out loud at this post. wait which was the guy with the coach bag and the warm up guy? i need some names here…. and wait guess what camp is in like 4 or 5 days. we better be in the same group. hahah oh and the waterbuffalo bass noise was probably audge

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