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“I will if you will”

My next topic is a little awkward to talk about. It may raise a few eyebrows and I may have a few family members complain. But it simply needs to be discussed. I am tired of hearing the same story about this issue. The solution is simple and I am here to bring light to the rarely spoken topic.


You just read that word and probably had one of three reactions.

1. “OMG. I can’t believe he is going to talk about that.”

2. “How does he know I do it?!”

3. “I hope this blog isn’t about me.”

Maybe your reaction was a mixture of all three. I have heard probably hundreds of stories about people who got caught sending dirty pictures of themselves or are pissed because they sent one and the recipient was showing it off. These stories piss me off because the solution is so simple.


As soon as you add your face to that image, it becomes evidence. It is no longer a sexy, one night fling. It is a document that can equal bribery. The recipient of that picture can bribe you, put you in jail, or show it off to their buddies. None of those options sound enticing to me. Don’t get me wrong, sexting has its place. But it has guidelines that MUST be followed.

1. Taking a picture of you completely naked in your bathroom mirror isn’t sexy and it isn’t cute. I understand that your bathroom mirror is big and allows you to take a wide angled photo. But please resist the urge to snap that picture with the shower curtain behind you and the toilet to your left. If you are trying to turn me on, try again.

2. Wierd angles can be scary. I don’t want to wonder “How the hell did you take that picture.” because that leaves my mind to wander. If you have to twist your arm back to take the picture, don’t take it. If you have to put your leg behind your head, don’t do it. Simple is always the better path when sending naked pictures of yourself.

3. If your face is in the picture, don’t press send. I know that it tells the other person that it is actually you, but it can also tell ANY OTHER person that looks at it, that it is YOU. Sometimes it is better just to be able to say “No, that actually isn’t my vagina.” But if your face is in the picture, you can’t exactly say that. Also, don’t send a picture of your face with you in a certain shirt, then send a picture of your genitalia with the same shirt present. It doesn’t take rocket science to put the two pieces of evidence together.

I hope this helps all of you in your nude-picture-sending agendas. Just remember to think before you press that little send button.


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